


A New England State of Mind

by squeakowl



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-04
Updated: 2013-06-04
Packaged: 2017-12-13 23:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/829956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squeakowl/pseuds/squeakowl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Agent Coulson persuades Nick Fury that the Avengers need a day off - a "day of fun", as it were. So they all pile into Tony's jet plane and head off to...Massachusetts?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A New England State of Mind

After Agent Coulson was deemed the best chaperone, the Avengers (plus Loki) decided that it was a good idea to go the Eastern States Exposition - all 6 New England states participate (Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Connecticut, Vermont, Rhode Island and Maine), and it's like 6 State Fairs all rolled into one. After they took Tony’s private jet back to Stark Tower, some research was done about what each person (or demi-god) enjoyed the most. Here are the results.

ATTRACTIONS:  
\- Tony likes going to the Better Living Center to look at all the gadgets, and figuring out how he could make them better. He also likes the hot-sauce/beef jerky booth. He loves spicy food, and bought 3 different bottles of hot-sauce, simply because the people running the booth said they were “scary-hot.” Tony basically considered that a challenge and plans to introduce Thor to the “After-Death” hot-sauce later in the week.  
\- Bruce likes going to the International Building because the souvenirs you can buy there are reminiscent of things he’s seen on his world travels; he bought a rather well-made Peruvian panpipe set there which made him very happy because he had always mentally kicked himself for not picking up an authentic set when he was last in South America. He is also quite partial to the barn where they keep the Budweiser Clydesdale horses – he likes how gentle they are, despite their intimidating strength and size.  
\- Clint enjoys the antique and classic car displays. He’s got a fascination with all the sleek lines of the cars from the 30s and 40s, and he loves the weird, space-ship quality of a lot of the 50s and 60s cars. He’s gotten reprimanded quite a few times for jumping into the cars and sitting in them without asking for permission first. Also, he likes the Geodesic Dome and the Farm-o-Rama…but only because he likes teasing Loki about the Budweiser Clydesdale horses. Although, he does like the sheep. He thinks they look silly in the canvas coats they wear after they’ve been sheared. He calls them “ninja sheep.”  
\- Loki actually likes the Geodesic Dome (but he is, of course, loath to admit it in front of anyone). He’s fond of the animals, but not for the disgusting way Clint suggests. He likes how trusting they are, and how they don’t immediately hate him on principle. Another thing he enjoys is the music and free concerts and shows that go on all day at the fair – he was particularly entertained by the Chinese Acrobats.  
\- Thor said he liked the parade the best – the pomp, and music, and frenzied happy atmosphere reminded him of celebratory victory parades in Asgard (admittedly, on a smaller scale.) He also thoroughly enjoyed the circus. He always likes watching talented beings (even Midgardians) showing off extraordinary skills – even he, Thor Odinson, Prince of Asgard, cannot swallow swords and breathe fire like that one fellow. Thor was also, for some inexplicable reason, absolutely fascinated by the airbrush booth. After 20 minutes of him staring at the airbrush artist like the guy was some sort of sorcerer, Loki (who was the only one who could physically move him) had to actually drag him away bodily so that they could move on.  
\- Steve liked Sorrowton Common. He especially liked that you could tour a preserved house from the 1700s – he liked that there was something at the fair that was older than he was. He also liked parts of the antique and classic car show (Clint gave him a brief tutorial of the cars from any time after 1943), and he thoroughly enjoyed the Avenue of States. Since he spent basically his whole life either in Brooklyn or in the army overseas (save for one brief excursion to Cape Cod when he was 14), he liked learning more about different US states. He said his favorite was the Vermont building.  
\- Natasha enjoys Sorrowton Village. She likes the more sedate shopping there and the artisan crafts, rather than the more frenetic shopping and cheap, tacky stuff for sale out on the main streets. She found an interesting booth with calligraphy prints of the meanings behind people’s names, and got one for each of the Avengers (plus Loki, Phil and Pepper) for Christmas gifts. Tony’s was particularly appropriate - Anthony (Tony) means “highly praiseworthy”, and she knew he’d just love that…Natasha means “born at Christmas.” Since she doesn’t actually know when her birthday is, she decided that Christmas was as good a time as any, and bought it for herself.  
\- Coulson has gone to the Eastern States Expo before (many times – he’s gone most years, ever since he was a kid), and he’s always loved the Avenue of States the best. He always loved learning about the different industries from New England, and he always loved the different foods. He has his rounds, and there are always a few specific booths within the buildings that he must visit. He loves the brick-oven pizza from the Vermont building, and the flannel pajamas from the New Hampshire building (he got a new set every other year when he was growing up, and now he gets a new set every 4 years as they wear out). His favorite, though, is the Massachusetts building. He positively adores the Finnish Pancakes. And there’s also the home-state pride thing – Phil is from Boston.

~~~

FOOD/DRINK:  
\- Tony likes the giant cinnamon buns. Even though they’re as big as your face, he insists on having at least one entirely to himself, no sharing. He also likes corndogs, which grosses Natasha out because Tony insists on slathering the things with so much mustard she doesn’t understand how he can taste anything else (Natasha hates mustard). She thinks it’s disgusting, but Tony doesn’t care…then again, does Tony ever care?  
\- Bruce normally eats very healthy, but since there’s nothing but junk to eat at an event like this, and it’s a once-a-year kind of deal, he gives himself permission to eat horrible stuff for one day. He especially likes the kettle-corn from Sorrowton Village. He can eat a whole jumbo bag himself in about half an hour, which is pretty impressive, considering it’s about 3 feet tall and they fill it up so far that you can’t close it. He also likes these things called millennium fries, which are kind of like a cross between potato chips and French fries. They’re really bad for you, but they’re a once-a-year kind of indulgence, so it’s OK. He likes them with cheese sauce on top.  
\- Clint’s favorite is these horribly unhealthy things called chicharrones, which are basically the Mexican version of pork-rinds. They’re sections of deep-fried pork fat, and they are disgusting and awesome and addictive. Clint puts a ton of salt and hot sauce on his. He also like the frighteningly neon drinks from the Slurpee booths that are everywhere. Phil had to cut him off after 6, though, because the sugar (plus whatever chemicals are in the things) was making Clint hyper. Or rather, they were making him more hyper than usual.  
\- Loki liked the giant turkey legs, because he’s kind of a picky eater, and they were one of the most basic things he could find to eat there that wasn’t deep-fried, covered in cheese, or both. Also, they are reminiscent of Asgard, so it was kind of comforting. Despite his slender frame, he ate 7. He’s also quite partial to the giant eclairs. In addition to the 7 turkey legs, he ate 4 eclairs.  
\- Thor…well. Thor isn’t picky. If it’s considered edible, he’ll try it. He’ll sometimes even try stuff that isn’t considered edible by the majority of the population. He was definitely the happiest of the crew when it came to the food, because everything he tried, he liked. Except for the deep-fried okra, he was a little leery of that.  
\- Steve likes cotton candy. Whenever he went to Coney Island when he was a kid, he was never allowed to go on any of the rides. He was, however, allowed as much cotton candy as he could eat. It’s sort of a nostalgic thing, for him. Plus, you can feel like you’re indulging with a lot of sweet stuff, and never really get all that full. Another Coney Island disappointment was that he was never allowed to eat hotdogs with the super spicy mustard that he secretly loved, even though it made his eyes tear up and started him coughing, which usually triggered an asthma attack (the reason he wasn’t allowed to eat them). Now, he can handle it, and hot dogs with the works are now honestly one of his favorite things about his Super-Serum-ized state. Also, he’s rather fond of the maple candy from the Vermont building.  
\- Natasha has a major sweet-tooth, so she loved the cream-puffs the Eastern States Expo is famous for. She also has a secret weakness for frozen lemonade. She can drink gallons of the stuff, and swears that there is absolutely nothing better or more thirst-quenching when you’re over-heated. Thor agrees. However, Thor agrees with basically everything about food, so it’s not really conclusive. Steve likes it too, but they usually make it too sweet for his taste.  
\- Coulson has always had a thing for fried dough. Heavy on the powdered sugar, hot from the fryer…he thinks it’s the best stuff on earth, total nirvana. He is also, oddly enough, likes the smoked-salmon-on-a-stick from the Maine building. None of the others had ever seen it served like that before, but Phil insisted that it was great. No one was convinced, except for Thor, but he’ll eat almost anything.

~~~

MIDWAY/RIDES/GAMES:  
\- Tony likes the Gravitron, the Zipper, and all the other thrill-rides – things that toss you around, and throw you up in the air, and go way too fast. G-force, and speed, and dangerous, dizzy-making things that make your loose change fall out of your pockets. He likes the feel of speed and power without the Iron Man suit; that way he can enjoy the ride without having to concentrate on making the suit work. Oddly enough, he finds all the rides that turn most peoples’ stomachs sort of relaxing, especially the flying chair thing. He actually dozed off on that one once.  
\- Bruce enjoys playing the water-gun games. You know…the ones where you point the jet of water at the target, and try to be the first one to get your thing to the top? He finds it meditative to focus on that one, tiny spot. He’s a dead-on shot with it, even earning Clint’s respect. Bruce is also the King of Whack-a-Mole. All the other Avengers say he goes into this weird, trance-like state and just hits every single mole. It’s said he’s never missed a single one. In addition to the concentration games, Bruce has always liked the carousel. He doesn’t sit on the horses; he leaves those for the kids. He likes those stationary carriages. He likes just sitting and relaxing and letting the wind ruffle his hair.  
\- Clint, naturally, loves the shooting gallery. He’s the best shot that many of the booth-runners have ever seen. He’s quick, too, and makes sure to win lots of stuffed toys. He doesn’t keep them, though – he divvies them up with Tony, and they walk around the fair and give them away to kids who are crying because they didn’t win one. In addition to the fluffy philanthropy, Clint also enjoys all the thrill-rides – the faster and more dangerous, the better.  
\- Loki enjoys the haunted houses. He enjoys being the one who’s frightened for once, instead of the one who frightens people, even if it’s just a bunch of plastic skeletons in sheets and jets of cold air. He also, inexplicably, adores the Niagara Falls water-luge ride.  
\- Thor also likes the Niagara Falls water-luge ride, but he’s banned from playing Whack-a-Mole ever since he cracked the game top (there’s a reason he wasn’t allowed to bring Mjolnir to the fair). He is very partial to the Slingshot ride, but hates the High-Drop. He says it reminds him too much of his banishment from Asgard.  
\- Steve likes the Funhouse and its hall of mirrors – he thinks it’s interesting to see the mirrors distort his reflection back to what he looked like pre-Serum. Also, he likes the Tilt-a-Whirl. He went on it once when he was 10, barfed, and loved every minute of it. His mother never let him go on it again, but he’s wanted to ever since. When he finally found it this time, he loved it just as much. He went on it 4 times in a row, and only hurled once.  
\- Natasha likes all the fast rides, as well as the shooting gallery. She actually likes most of the rides, except for the Polar Express car-ride. She doesn’t like that one on principle ever since Tony made the crack about her getting a fur bikini like the girls painted on the sides of the ride. He got his foot stomped on for that.  
\- Phil is a man of classic tastes – he likes all the basics; stuff like the ring-toss, the Ferris wheel, the knock-the-milk-bottles-down-with-a-baseball. He also likes the bumper-cars. In fact, everyone likes the bumper-cars. Heaven help anyone who’s in one of the cars when all 8 of them are on at the same time.

~~~

SOUVENIRS:  
\- In addition to his hot-sauce, Tony also purchased 4 dozen whoopee pies to take back to Stark Tower to freeze. He says they’re the best thing ever when they’re frozen, and he gets hungry when he’s up all night working. He also, for some reason, bought Thor a t-shirt from the airbrush booth. It’s huge, and it’s got “Princess” on it, done in lavender and flanked by dolphins. Thor was amused, but he “lost it” on the way back to NYC.  
\- Bruce bought his set of panpipes in the International building he also got some alpaca shearling slippers there, too. After living in India and South America for so long, everywhere else feels cold to him, especially the extremely air-conditioned halls of Stark Tower. So he got some extra warm slippers.  
\- Clint bought a black cowboy hat. Why? Because why not? He also bought a crap-ton of candy from the bulk-bins in the Better Living Center. He really likes the spearmint leaves.  
\- Loki didn’t buy anything, but he kept one of the photos they take of you when you go down the water-luge ride. It was of him and Thor, and for once they both look happy at the same time. It’s nice to have a record of it.  
\- Thor also got a copy of the photo from the water-luge. And he saw a necklace with Mjolnir on it, and couldn’t pass up the opportunity. Now he can have it with him even when he’s in Midgardian civilian clothes. Also, he now has about 50 strands of Mardi Gras beads that the floats in the parade were throwing to the crowds. He was awesome at catching them (mainly because he’s so tall), and Clint helped him out by climbing on top of the gyro truck (much to Coulson’s chagrin) and putting his sniper skills to good use on the ones that went over everyone’s heads.  
\- Steve picked up a few caramel apples to take home. He really likes them, and says you can never find the ones with peanuts in supermarkets. He also bought a Superman t-shirt, but only because Tony convinced him to by saying that he needed to “stop dressing his age.” Clint laughed “at the irony” but wouldn’t explain why.  
\- Natasha got the name prints for everyone, as well as a lovely silver necklace for herself – a cut-work version of an 1899 Russian ruble coin, in silver – she doesn’t wear gold.  
\- Coulson remembered how much he wanted a carved Emu egg from the Vermont building when he was 12. He had saved up for it for a year, and he was sorely disappointed when the one he wanted turned out to be way out of his budget. This year, he charged it to S.H.I.E.L.D.’s credit card. To hell with the consequences – he’s wanted that Emu egg for decades, dammit.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you have as much fun reading this as I did writing it. Considering I'm Massachusetts born-and-raised, the Big E was/is a high-point in the fun parts of my life. I assume that it can still be amusing if you don't know what the Big E is (think of it as a giant fun-fair/carnival/state fair). But I just know that those of you readers who have been to the Big E will know exactly what points I'm talking about. :)
> 
> Also - I would be totally flattered if anyone did fanart for this. Seriously. I'd even link to your work in the notes here!
> 
> The fic was originally a head-canon I submitted here: http://theavengersheadcanons.tumblr.com/post/32630908806/a-new-england-state-of-mind


End file.
